Berlin – Stress – Friendships – Future

So this is a multi-purpose post which hopefully will not be too abrupt. This past weekend I went to Berlin (for the first time!!) and I was so excited. Unfortunately a few hours after arriving I was struck with a stomach illness. Did I let that get me down? Nahh. I still went to the Black Keys concert in an abandoned warehouse (no, I’m not sure it really is an abandoned warehouse but it definitely looked like one) although I had to sit on a bench in the back since I couldn’t properly stand without feeling like death was upon me. The subway was actually the death of me, we had to get off every other stop for me to become violently ill and to cool down before continuing. Yet, there were highlights like the Ritter Sport World and G-Man and I making our own chocolate bars. I made one with coconut macarons, little m&ms, and gingerbread pieces in milk chocolate. G-Man made his with gingerbread pieces, dried strawberry bits and chili pepper. His was way better which was hard to admit since I can actually make the chocolates myself, but there you have it. His was magic and mine was a weird combo.

Berlin was freezing too, unbelievably freezing, like Boston freezing which you’d think I would be used to since um hello, hometown, but nope I was wearing 2 pairs of pants, three sweaters, gloves, hat, winter boots and coat, and two scarfs and it still wasn’t enough. We were able to see the Brandenburger Tor, the Reichstag, Checkpoint Charlie, where the wall used to be…. and that was about it. Sure we were there for about 36 hours, but there was too much to see and not enough time to see it in the freezing cold. And I was sick. So on Monday I went to the doctor’s office just to make sure everything is ok only to find out that getting a stomach bug twice in one month is not necessarily normal and the doc thinks I have a stomach ulcer from the stress of moving abroad, starting a new job, and other miscellaneous stressful things. No one tells you that when you move abroad that this is a possibility. I mean did you ever hear that someone moves abroad and their physical health gets worse and their mental health is not what it used to be, mostly from stress but also can be contributed to loss of your belongings you had to say goodbye to in order to board the flight, you can’t talk to your friends as much anymore, things are just so…. different. This can lead to stress and depression which is completely normal. 

Which leads me to friendship. I’ve been here for about 5 months now and I’ve made approx. 1 friend. I have casual acquaintances at work, but that’s about it. I’ve met a few bloggers here but our timing and lives never seemed to match up, and what’s the point of that. I could try to do the Internations thing so I can actually meet and keep some friends here, but my mind just isn’t ready for the mingling and such just yet. How do other people make friends in a new country not necessarily known for being overly friendly OR having crossovers in the form of professional and personal relationships?  I mean I’m not at school anymore, I can’t meet people in similar situations to mine who happen to be studying and living in the same dorm- that’s how I met the G-Man and other friends. I finished school and although I need to begin my level 2 German classes, this is the extent of which I will be meeting people similar to me.

And future-wise, I’m going back to the US this March and I’m excited. I want to see the only two members of my family who actually give me the time of day and treat me with such love and care, and my friends that make me laugh and seem to appreciate my wackiness, although my California sister won’t be there, I hope to see her later this year. That was a run-on sentence, am I right? And after this trip,  I will work for months than hightail it Italy for a week or two. And then at Christmas time, I might go to California to spend time with my sister from another mother and mister lol.

Sure it might not all be quite as awesome as I thought it would be when I moved here, but is just as different as I knew it would be. I may not have a lot of friends, and I may get often enough, but it is fun in-between all these things and my future is shaping up very nicely. We’ll see how it all plays out.


5 thoughts on “Berlin – Stress – Friendships – Future

  1. I hope you are feeling better now. What a shame that your Berlin trip had to be ruined by a stomach bug.

    As for making friends, it is hard in Germany, mainly cause here as a general rule Germans do not make new friends after they leave University, even Germans complain about this. I have found I have made friends through hobbies – English speaking theatre company in my case, German classes and expat or English speaking meet-ups (, or though you will need to be prepared to do a hell of a lot of mingling.

    Making friends as an adult is much harder than making friends at university and in Germany, it is ten times tougher because of the culture here, however it is possible but only if you are prepared to put some work into it.

  2. Making friends here is a bit harder, but I find my friends here are true FRIENDS, in every sense of the word. Much to my shock and dismay at my friends in the US….or some of them at least.
    Re: physical ailments….I hear you! I´ve had a leg thing that made my leg NUMB, I´ve had a cold that wouldn´t go away…for two weeks, and it ended with full blown fever/chills. I currently have something in the corner of my mouth that won´t go away, going to Apotheke today after emailing my US doctor. I´ve never had so many physical ailments. Thankfully, nothing serious (yet), but I attribute it to stress.
    I´d also suggest ChickHaus (check them out on FB) I haven´t been to one of their meetups yet, but planning to tomorrow (if I can stand the cold, I may skip it)…but they are a group of English speaking women 20´s and 30´s. Tomorrow is a meetup at a sushi place in Erlangen. Also, Internations is for expats, and has a quite active group in Nürnberg. Their meetups never seem to coincide with my schedule (ARGH), but I´ve had some communication with their Nürnberg “ambassador” (Marcel is his name maybe?) and he is REALLY nice and welcoming.

  3. I should also add, a) I look forward to meeting you in a few weeks, b) take a B complex vitamin, I am not sure, but I think it is helping me (save for the whatever on my mouth) with the stress I didn´t know I was feeling and c) I find it easier to remind myself that I CAN go home if I want to, and then remember reasons I don´t REALLY want to.

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