Say What?

We’re (hopefully) babymooning here in September!

Remember my mostly negative review of Greece? Well I forgot to say something really positive about that trip,  something that I’ve never experienced back in America. Europeans are completely comfortable with their bodies, and do not care how you look or what you wear. You could be 350 pounds, squeezed into an itty bitty polka-dot bikini, and no one bats an eye. You read that correctly, no one cares. These are the people who are comfortable wearing speedos, and are 100% fine with nudity on tv, signs, news, and at the pool. This is an incredibly refreshing perspective to experience especially when you come from America, home of the body/fat shaming. Now that’s not to say Europeans don’t judge you, oh goodness do they. If I walk out wearing clothing too colorful, shoes that don’t match the rest of my outfit, my coat not buckled yet tied, I tend to get some strange looks. Add that on top of not being African (which is pretty much their experience with dark people), yet being much darker than their pale complexions and you have a lot of looks coming your way. If no one stares at me on the way to the grocery store, I feel like they are not only getting used to me, but that I’m dressed correctly.

Anyway, this got to me to think about Germany again, and will this be the place we raise our multicultural babes. Remember a long time ago I wrote a list of reasons why I cannot imagine leaving, and that was a pretty good list. But I’ll do you a few more. I may not understand the education system, but I’ve read enough articles to know it’s more successful than ours, so I guess that’s pretty good. UNIVERSITY is free. Cannot express how that makes me feel articulately, but I’m in the dumps with my own student multicultural catalonialoan issues and the increasing rates. And of course, in leu of the Trayvon Martin decision, we don’t live in a place where an unarmed kid can walk late at night, get followed, get fatally shot, and his killer wouldn’t be jailed for 44 days after the incident. And then Zimmerman, after giving an implausible (physically so) explanation, would not get any sort of punishment. That really upsets me, and this isn’t the first time I’ve been upset with the news (I usually am actually, I just don’t write about it), but the reason I’m bringing this up is because we’re having a child; how would I feel losing my child like that, or having to explain to my child that “sweetie, you can’t walk outside so late at night with a hoodie on, someone might profile you, kill you and would get away with it.” What kind of message does that send to the youth of America? Can you imagine how Trayvon Martin’s parents feel?

But I digress….  my emotions are high, so let’s move on for the sake of levity to other, less intense thoughts. I’m definitely going through something in Germany at the moment, whether it’s just loneliness as most of my friends and family being are so far away, I have cravings for foods that don’t exist in Germany, I still haven’t had a wedding, and probably never will :-(, and I won’t have a baby shower because I don’t have that kind of support/friend system over here. And I had this whole autumny Halloween themed planned party for a baby shower too, mostly because I love making Halloween treats and candies. Wah wah. But this is still a better place for us and babyface; we have a better quality of life over here, I don’t have to work my butt off to pay the bills, 3623855_f520cost of living is cheaper, the quality of food is better and healthier, traveling around is cheaper… that more than makes up for my loneliness and somewhat selfish dreams.  And to be honest, if I went home right now, I’m not even sure where I’d go or who I’d stay with, I don’t have friends and family like that anymore that will give me a place to stay and spend time pampering me, my Mom is gone and she was that person. So I better hop to it and make some lasting forever friendships over here, or I may become a weird recluse that starts collecting weird things and muttering things to myself.

Those are my thoughts for now, random and emotional and hard to articulate but I’m sure you get me.


8 thoughts on “Say What?

  1. Hi Ellie,
    I really enjoy reading about your life in Germany. From 1967 to 1972 I was a student in West Berlin and also worked as a translator. To this day I still regard Berlin as my second home. That was beyond doubt one of the highlight periods of my life. I envy you for your experiences you are having and even feel a little homesick for Germany. I love the Germans even with their irritating habits. They are opinionated and blunt but I learned that if you don’t let them intimidate you they will respect you and like you. When it comes to openhearted hospitality they can’t be beat. If you can really get a handle on their language they will be friends for life. I have such friends among them. Thanks for sharing your life with us. You are to be commended for your openmindedness. Your G-man sounds like quite a guy and I would like to meet both of you sometime. I’ve got to get back to Berlin. Love that town! If I get over there, may I look you up? Alles gute. Tchoess, Jim Cloud

    1. Hello Jim! While we don’t live close to Berlin 😦 , we are always around so feel free to drop a line anytime! I’m still trying to get a handle on their language, but they aren’t so bad (although I’ve Bavarians are the worst of the bunch). I’m glad Germany left such a great impression on you, and I’m hoping I can be so positive about the experience sooner rather than later. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Hey!! I think you’re pretty awesome too lol. We should talk, I can write you an email or something with private info, like whatsapp or facebook or something. Let’s do that!

  2. listen up ladyface, my offer still stands, after august 1 (plus or minus a week for thesis defence time) i have all the time in the world to help you baby up your world if you like. I’m sorry i can’t offer much financial support (like buying baby shower stuff), but i have a set of free hands and we can talk halloween all you like, if you are interested 🙂 i know all about the longing for an american ally and i figure the bayern ticket can hellp me make it happen. you have my facebook and my skype, im always available for a pick me up chat if you need it! (except the night before the first of august…lol) much love!

    1. Thanks Vanessa! Yeah, I gotta get myself together and make plans with you at some point. I’m still in the exhausted phase of pregnancy where everything is going well for a few hours and then I pass out. I’m hoping that lets up soon, either way I’m on a mission for donuts so we could always trek with some friends to a city where donuts exist?

  3. Hello Ellie!

    Looooove your blog. Read about it on Tatiana in Flux the other day and since then I’ve read every post since the beginning. It was like watching a great mini-series or reading a great book. Good stuff. I am new to the expat life (less than 6 months in South Korea) and I really loved watching your journey unfold through your posts. Makes me wonder what’s in store for me abroad. (I am from Brooklyn and this is my first time in Asia.)

    Thanks for sharing your ups and downs. Your story is really inspiring. Specifically, your sticktoitness (that’s a word. LOL) This is the most honest expat blog that I’ve come across period.

    Re: student loans. If you have federal loans check out income based repayment plans. Game changer. Your payments are based on your salary. I believe it’s taps out at 15% of your income. You can apply online or through your student loan companies. Hope this helps! Education is so darn expensive. . .even years after graduation.

    You are now in my favs folder on BlogLovin’ 🙂 Wishing you and your husband continued happiness! And wishing you a healthy and easy pregnancy!

    1. Thank you so much!! Good luck with living abroad, there will definitely be ups and downs and it’s all about attitude, not that mine is awesome but I’m trying to be all sticktoit-y, lol, also not sure if that’s a word. Thanks for the tip about student loans, I’ll give it a try and see what happens. And coming from Brooklyn has got to be tough, man I love Brooklyn! I hope you can keep in touch and if you ever want to email me, it’s

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